Entry #15: Is that cheating? 


When I came home from schol today I had it all figured out that I was definitely going to have a conversation with my parents about Chaz. Only it wasn't going to be a screaming scene/power battle like last time. No way! This time I was just going to talk to them very calmly and let them know how I felt. I wasn't going to blame them for their narrow mindedness... I wasn't even going to talk about their feelings or how I felt about their feelings. I was simply going to tell them what I planned to do, which, simply put, is this: I'm going to live my own life! I figure that if I don't ask them for their permission then they won't have an opportunity to say "No." And I really don't need their permission. It's ridiculous to think that I do. I mean, this is a democracy, right? And I"m a citizen, so that means, even though I am legally dependent on my parents... wait a minute, as a minor do I have any rights at all? I know I can't vote and I can't sign a binding contract (I learned that from a Business Law elective I took last year at my old school) but still, I must have some rights. Don't I?

You know, now that I think about it, I'm not sure that I do. I mean, if my parents abandoned me or are negligent in their care of me in some way, I know there are such things as Children's Protective Services and that come in and can take kids away from parents who are doing a lousy job. Does that mean that all I am guaranteed is protection, but I don't actually have any rights of my own? What does that make me in the eyes of the law? A helpless animal!? Some kind of creature without any ability to make decisions of my own? Pretty depressing!

After fuming over that reality for a while I decided that it didn't make any sense to Declare my Independence from my parents. At least not until I'm 18 and really do have some guaranteed legal rights.

Instead I logged on to The InSite chat to see if I could find someone interesting to talk to. (I'm still not allowed to use the phone). Computers are all right though because my parents think that anything you do on a computer that requires typing, has to be educational (well, not everything, but I don't own any games). I'm glad they think so.

Anyway, as soon as I popped into The InSite chat I met this guy named Elvin. He said he was from London and was 18. I don't remember how it happened ... (Oh yes I do! We were talking about teen rights, how could I forget that?) And then we started having a one to one conversation. It was really cool! I never met anyone on the Internet that was so easy for me to talk to. (He types really fast too and so do I. I think that's cool). We talked so easily about so much stuff that I felt I was having a reunion with an old friend instead of just meeting someone new. We spent about an hour and a half online and exchanged email addresses. Before we said good night we arranged to meet online tomorrow night, same time, same place.

While I was brushing my teeth and couldn't stop thinking about this guy in London. He has his own flat and works part time in an art gallery while he goes to art college. He's not that much older than me but he's so independent. He said that if I was ever in London I should visit him. As if my parents would ever let me. But wait! I'll be 18 in a few years and then I won't need their permission for anything.

As I was setting my alarm clock I glanced into the open drawer of my night table. There was the poem that Chaz left in my locker. When I saw it I felt a little guilty. But I don't know why I should. And It's not like I did anything wrong. I was just talking to this guy on the internet. Is that cheating?

What do you think?




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