Hey Terra!

Terra's Past Letters


Communication Problems:
"Whenever she's with me and them, she basically ignores me."

Hey Terra,

I am going to a totally new school so I had to start all over making friends. In the middle of October, a girl "Brenna" transferred into our school. She sat near me in math so I decided to ask if she wanted to have lunch with me and my friends. She did and we became friends. We never hung out outside of school, but when we were in school we were always together.

Recently, she's been hanging out with "Tina" and "Mercy" who I was sort of friends with. What I've noticed is that whenever I'm in class with just Brenna, she acts normally, but whenever she is around Tina and Mercy she basically ignores me. I don't know why she is doing this and it really bothers me because I was the first person to even talk to her. And without me being her friend she would have never even have met the other two.

So, do you think I should ask Brenna why she acts this way when she is with them? Or should I just not say anything because I haven't known her long enough? I don't want to seem like I am overly sensitive or anything. What should I do?




Dear Belle,

I think you've known Brenna and hung out with her long enough to ask her why she's acting this way. What do you have to lose? If she's not aware of ignoring you when the other two are around, then you've given her a wake up call and let her know that you don't like being treated that way. If she's doing it on purpose and isn't willing to change, then you've learned something important about her... that she's not the kind of friend you need. In either case, you have stood up for yourself and showed self-respect.

So, yes... I think you should talk to her privately.

Good luck!

In friendship,


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