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Terra's Past Letters


"My step-sister really hurts my feelings."

Hey Terra,

I just had a fight with my step-sister. She really hurts my feelings sometimes. She says I'm fat and stupid. Whenever I think of it it makes me cry.



Dear Unappreciated,

I'm so sorry to hear that you and your step-sister aren't getting along. It's never okay to call people names (especially when you know that it's going to upset them.) That only makes things worse. And yet, many of us get so angry at times that we feel like hurting another person even though we know it's not a good or kind thing to do. You say that you and your step-sister just had a "fight". That tells me that you were angry at her too. Instead of continuing with the fighting, the name calling, and the hurt feelings, how about trying something different?

It sounds like you need some help making the peace in your family. Since you're the one who wrote to me, I'd suggest you take the leadership role and tell your parents about the problem and ask if they will help. My guess is that they would love to see you and your step-sister get along and so they'll be happy to work with you. (A happy family -- what a great gift that would be for the whole family during the holiday season or anytime!)

You and your step-sister deserve to have a much better relationship with each other... and you CAN! I suggest that show your mom this email and together with your step-dad, she can call a Family Meeting. You can find out more about Family Meetings by reading this article I wrote.

Good luck. I hope this helps.

In friendship,


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