Hey Terra!

Terra's Past Letters


Wish I had one:
"I'm not interested in a relationship but..."

Hey Terra,

I haven't been single in a while. I've been kinda seeing 2 guys for like the last year (at different times!). But now I'm single and loving it! Except for the fact that I have a crush on this guy, and I'm pretty much off my game. I have no idea how to talk to him now. Before, when I had a b/f, I could talk to him cuz he was like, my friend... but it's SO hard for me now. It's not like I want another relationship or anything right now, cuz I'm fine with not having a b/f (I just wanna flirt with him!), but I really just want to go back to being my confident self... like the one who can actually breathe around him!

Suddenly Shy


Dear Suddenly Shy,

You say you are "loving" being single and that you don't want another relationship "or anything" right now... And yet you are flirting with this guy. My definition of flirting is "creating a sexual expectation." So, it seems to me, in spite of what you say, you really do want to get with this guy... That's why you're "off your game" as you put it... Because his approval matters very much to you.

Take a look inside and see if that's really the truth rather than this "I love being single" stuff.

In friendship,


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