Hey Terra!

Terra's Past Letters


Sex and Sexuality:
"I told people me and my gf had sex but we didn't."

Hey Terra,

I have a real problem... I am 13 years old and I lie about everything, I had this girlfriend and we only went on two dates and hung out a couple of times. All we did was kiss but I was a real ***hole to her and I lost her because of it. Now she has given up on me. I think she is super hot and I still love her.

She left the school she went to last year and now I go there. I told everyone we had sex even though we didn't. I never thought she would find out about my little white lie, but she did cuz now she is back there and she won't talk to me or even look at me... I feel bad. I am such a dumb ass what should I do????????????

Dumb Ass


Dear Dumb Ass,

You think that telling people that you had sex with a girl who you just kissed is a "little white lie"??! I'm surprised that you don't yet realize that what you said was very hurtful and damaging to her reputation.

You say you "feel bad I am such a dumb ass"... Do you feel bad that you lied and damaged her reputation or do you feel bad because she found out about your lie?

Maybe it's difficult for you to understand how a girl would be so upset and outraged and disappointed and hurt by this. To her, I'm sure it felt like she was completely betrayed by someone she trusted. If someone betrayed you and caused other people to think you were a skank or a slut or a cheat or a drug addict, do you think you'd be all friendly to that person?

I know why you did this... Because you wanted to seem like a big shot in the eyes of your friends. But that's not ever a good reason to lie and hurt someone.

You absolutely owe this girl an apology. Whether she decides to ever talk to you again would be her choice.

In friendship,


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