Terra's Past Letters

With Love

Dear With Love,

One's sexual identity is something you are born with. I don't believe you can "get away" from who you are. People who have tried to live a heterosexual life when they are homosexual or bisexual can cause themselves great mental stress and emotional anguish. It is my belief that it is a healthier choice to come to terms with your sexuality. It sounds like you could use some support. If you are a student, I would suggest that you make an appointment with your school counselor. If that is not possible, then I would suggest that you do a little bit of research and find a counselor who works for the local Department of Health and Social Services.

You could begin by going to this website -- www.pflag.org. That is the site of an international organization called PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays).

Here is a quote from the Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) section of that site:

Q: Is there something wrong with being gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender?

A: There have been people in all cultures and times throughout human history who have identified themselves as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender (GLBT). Homosexuality is not an illness or a disorder, a fact that is agreed upon by both the American Psychological Association and the American Psychiatric Association. Homosexuality was removed from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) of the American Psychiatric Association in 1974. Being transgender or gender variant is not a disorder either, although Gender Identity Dysphoria (GID) is still listed in the DSM of the American Psychiatric Association. Being GLBT is as much a human variation as being left-handed -- a person's sexual orientation and gender identity are just another piece of who they are. There is nothing wrong with being GLBT -- in fact, there's a lot to celebrate.

What is wrong are discriminatory laws, policies and attitudes that persist in our schools, workplaces, places of worship and larger communities. PFLAG works to make sure that GLBT people have full civil rights and can live openly, free from discrimination and violence.

The most important thing is for you to reach out to people who you can trust and talk about the feelings you are experiencing around this issue of sexuality.

I sincerely hope that this information calms you and encourages you to talk with someone you can trust. You are not alone. Please, do yourself a favor and reach out to a counselor or an Gay Organization for support.