Dee's Journal



Entry #12: I am strong.


I called Becca as soon as I got off the phone with Miguel. Her mother answered the phone and sounded kinda suspicious when she asked me who I was. I told her, and she said that she would get Becca.

Becca was upset. She said that she had told her parents about Chaz and she had gotten grounded for being "rude." I told her I was sorry that happened and I hoped she didn't blame me for giving her bad advice. She said that she didn't blame me at all, in fact, she thinks it was good that the whole thing happened. She felt proud of herself for standing up to her father. That she should have done it a long time ago. As for Chaz, she was planning to tell Chaz all about it tomorrow at school.

I told her I was proud of her. Then I told her it was my turn to ask her for advice. I told her what happened with Juan in the car and that I hadn't told Miguel, even though he was so sweet and he could tell something was wrong. Then I told her that Miguel had just called me and that he had heard about what happened. Of course, if he heard what happened he heard the lie not the truth. Now I don't know what to do.

"Becca, can you help me?"

And she was great. She said that I owed it to Miguel to tell him the truth. She said that I have nothing to be ashamed of or afraid of.

"Dee, you didn't do anything wrong. You have to tell yourself that. Juan sexually assaulted you. That's against the law. He's the one that ought to be afraid of the truth coming out, not you."

"But he said that if told Miguel, he was going to tell him that I had come on to him! I don't want Miguel to think that!"

Then she said that I needed to trust Miguel to know the truth when he heard it. But if all he hears is a lie then how will he know what the truth is?

Becca was right. I didn't do anything wrong. That creep Juan was just trying to keep me from telling anyone what a skunk he is. Why should I help protect him? No way! He's scum and I am a strong woman who is going to speak out against what he did. He needs to know that he cannot treat girls that way. I did nothing wrong. Miguel will believe me. I'm going to tell him tomorrow.

Becca said she was proud of me. I felt proud of myself too. (Which is better than feeling scared and ashamed. A lot better!)




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