when I had gathered up all my courage to
deal with my parents and had that huge
fight you'd think I would want to take a
rest from social confrontation, right? No
way. I had to go push it a little further
and ask Chaz out.
was I thinking?!
you know what he said, "No!" I am so
embarrassed! The first time I ever ask a
guy out he says no, he just wants us to be
friends. All right, all right! I know
that's what I said to him when he asked me
to the dance. But this is different. Very
different! I mean, I told my parents about
him and how I liked him and everything.
And I made this big defiant move and shot
off my big mouth about how I was going to
defy them and go out with him anyway even
if they forbid me to. So what happens to
my great political statement? Nothing!
Totally nothing. So now their expecting me
to defy them (which I'd love to do) and I
have nobody to defy them with!
could scream! I'm pissed off at myself for
being so stupid to think that Chaz really
liked me as more than a friend anyway. If
Wendie had asked him out I'm sure he would
have gone. This whole thing with Chaz is
nothing more than an adolescent romantic
fantasy. What else could it be, coming
from the mind of a hopelessly romantic
is bad, very bad. Now not only don't I
have a boyfriend (which I never really had
but at least I had the fantasy of one). I
probably have just completely ruined the
best friendship I've ever had.
going, Becca. Cool move. Stupid. Stupid.